Luvonie

Allo..lama sangat tak ber blogging sampai tak tau nak mula dari mana. Di gagahi juga hari ni walaupun actually tak eager sangat pun nk menulis di sini. Maybe mood perpisahan dah lama terasa. The day to say good bye to my little angels is nearer so mama feel teribly down. Hate to be far away from them! Walaupun anak-anak boleh dikategori kan lasak (diperakui oleh ramai org) tapi biarlah mereka di depan mata. Tapi nak buat macam mana kan, government servant, 'saya yang menurut perintah'..nak tak nak pergi lah jugak.. . Hopefully the next 2 weeks (18 days to be exact) is over very very soon.... . Hate it.
So, few things which happen last month is mamaonie and few collegue move to our new building. After 5 years, we finally got our own room. Good bye to my sweet room mate..cik nur ilida. Pelik jugak biler dok asing-asing..sbb dh terbiasa sangat2 bersama. Anyway, nak set up tempat baru bukan mudah rupanya. Dh sebulan duduk pun banyak sangat-sangat hal. Macam-macam perkara yang tertangguh. Hopefully, sape-sape yang akan mewarisi tempat ni nanti berpuas hati dengan sistem yang baru jer siap di set up ni. Peningnya kepala. Hopefully, after back from training nanti, everything is settle dan boleh mulakan kerja dengan jayanya... .Aminn..banyak sangat yang tertangguh.
Back to my little angels, they are doing great. Makin lasak, makin bijak. Akif domok makin banyak vocabulary nya.Kelaka. Lasaknya buat org-org keliling geleng kepala jer..tapi at the same time manja la sangat. Tak leh berenggang langsung. Kakak auni makin bijak. Tak boleh salah cakap ngan dier..nampak dah boleh berfikir macam budak besar. Selera alhamdullillah makin ok..so, mama tak pening sangat nak masak apa-apa sekarang . Hopefully they are doing great while mama been training and babah working at CH. Nasib baik cuti sekolah, so most probably cousins dierorg akan ada, so harap-harap kurang lah sket perhatian dierorg (esp akif!) tentang mama n babah. Aminn.. .
Ok, i have nothing more to write. Mama will be in New Delhi this thursday. First time being far away from family. Luckily ada kak faiz, so hopefully tak lah rasa boring sangat. Do know why tak rasa excited, sbb kena gi New Delhi kot or paling utama kena jauh dari anak-anak. Bencinya... . Hopefully everything will turn fine. Hopefully my dear husband can take a great care the two angels during that time.. . I miss them already.. .Till then, bye.

Salam.. .Lama la sungguh tak mem blog kan diri. Atas alasan yg sama, suasana sgt la tak kondusif lately. Major rennovation hanya beberapa meter dari bilik, menyebabkan masa di bilik amat sgt la terhad. Bingit sungguh dan tak selamat dikelilingi kontraktor-kontraktor ni. Kat umah pulak, almaklumlah terkejar-kejar menguruskan seorang diri 2 org kenit yg tgh lasak, maka tiap-tiap malam, by d time anak-anak tido, mama pun flat jugak join tido sekali. Jgn harap lah dpt surf internet kat umah. Anyway, hopefully tak terlambat nk update psl raya tahun ini...syawal 1430..

i. Baju raya mama tak siap lagik. Dah habis syawal pun tailor tak leh tepati janji. Its going to be the first and last time hantar kat dier. Tobat. Manis mulut sungguh. Lembut gigi dari lidah. 1st time in my life, tak dapat pakai baju raya idaman. Pi beli baju siap sbb bersungguh nk tepati tema, kesudahannya bayar duit saman kat pak cik jpj. Hampess la sgt.

ii. Collection raya auni n akif. Wallhualam. sbb mama n babah tak berkesempatan nk kira lagi. End up duit tu masih dlm sampulnya. Ada kot mama pinjam sket2. Nnt mama byr pukal semula la yer. Nampak gaya mcm merosot jumlahnya. Agaknya la. Tak pe la dh rezeki mcm tu thn ni.

iii. Sambutan raya. Alhamdullillah masih meriah. 1st day raya kat pahang. Balik kg, jumpa saudara mara. Makan-makan mcm biasa. 2nd day balik johor. Almost 10 hrs journey. Akif muntah mcm pe dlm keter. Penat sgt rasanya dier. Sampai johor, 1st day jer rasa mcm raya. The next-next day, babah lepas gian memancing berjam-jam. Hampess la sungguh. Nak protes pun tak leh buat pe sbb dh tu hobi kegemaran dier.

Tu jer kot laporan raya. Open hse tak byk pi sbb 2nd week babah dh out station masuk kenyir. Mama dok tunggang terbalik kat umah dengan 2 org itu. So, raya kami lps masuk kejer biasa-biasa jer.

Anyway update about 2 little monsters. Both of them have their own pets. Mama n babah baru giat membela rabbit semula. 3 breed of rabbits, tp ada 4 ekor. Loop, wooly n anggora. 2 of them, wooly n loop (mama n auni punya rabbit) had been stolen. Sedih sungguh. Baru tau betapa sayangnya pada binatang. Rindu sangat-sangat keleteh wooly n loop. Actually the 2 anggora tu pun dh hilang. Tapi rabbit adik balik the next day after somebody break up their cage. While rabbit babah come back after 2 nights of missing. Its so amazing. How they feel close to us. Syukur alhamdullillah we still have them. We bought new loop since we thought nobody will come back afer 2 nights, but it happen the new loop is so shy. Till today tak ngam ngan previous rabbit, so tak tentu pasal ada sangkar lain pulak. Hopefully they stay with us forever. Actually kiterorg pun pernah bela rabbit sampai 4 yrs. But during mama maternity leave, nenek bg kat org lain then org tu sembelihkan. Amat sgt la sedih sampai sekarang. Feel sooo guilty. Babah pun ada kitten. Both kids love to play with it. Entah mcm mana we all panggil kitten tu Jude. Akif and auni definately will looking for jude each time coming home. And today, babah have to come back to CH and bring Jude together. Mesti melilau budak-budak tu cari mana dier. Kesian jugak, tapi mama mmg surrender nk jaga cat sbb tak tahan sgt ngan bau dier. Tengokla mcm mana kan.

Ok la..lps sudah rindu dendam. Nnt boring, update lagi. Feel quite down rite now since have to say good bye to babah. We back to our so-called-normal life. Boringggg. Till then, bye.

Salam.. . Almost 4 weeks blog ni dormant without any reason.. . Nak kata sibuk, tak juga sbb as usual Ramadhan bulan memanjakan diri kat opis. Plan nk buat jugak lab, tapi buat jugak tu tak tau biler sbb malas yg melampau-lampau..plus konon2 suasana yang tak kondusif lately - blackout selalu.. (alasan-alasan). Anyway, berapa hari dah puasa pun tak ingat sangat sbb the first 8 days, mamaonie tak puasa (still tak nampak anak bulan!). Bercintanya nk ganti nnt, dh la extra 2 days dr puasa sunat syawal. Adooiii... .

So, Ramadhan as usual, for others including me..bulan yang ditunggu. Bulan penuh berkat, peluang melipat gandakan pahala. But deep inside, this is the saddest moment in my life. Almost 4 yrs we going through Ramadhan, sampai satu tahap rasa kosong sangat-sangat. Yer la most of couples, berbuka dan sahur sama-sama. But we, hanya berbuka biler weekend. Most of time sendiri-sendiri.. .Sedih sangat. Dan seperti biasa jugak, selalu mamaonie berbuka dengan air dan kurma sahaja, when everything is settle - dinner for kids is settle, mandi dierorg settle etc baru la boleh makan berbuka. Which is happen ususally after Isyak. Dah terbiasa dan tak payah banyak songeh sbb bukan banyak choice pun. Ujian dari Allah untuk kami manusia yang rasanya mmg kurang beramal berlipat ganda macam org lain waktu Ramadhan ni (agaknya). So, this is my life and i have to face it. Redha jer la kan. Kalau tak makan hati jer. Pasar Ramadhan pun baru 4 kali pegi (yea! berjaya mengekang nafsu or takut H1N1 or susah la nk angkut 2 askar kecik pi pasar). So, this year berbuka puasa rasanya dpt memaksimumkan rezeki tanpa membazir..Alhamdullillah. Hopefully ia kekal sampai hujung Ramadhan hendaknya..Insya Allah.

Anyway for syawal, Insya allah everything dh ready kot. Baju semua dh shopping (except baju melayu domok-sebab baju tu nk pakai utk bergambar jer). Baju mama tak amik2 lagi, nervous gak tailor tak call2 sbb 2 months before ramadhan dh hantar.. . Baju kebaya kakak , kind of kena paksa beli ngan prinsipal dier (kalau ada jamuan raya kat school kakak mesti most of the girls pakai kebaya pattern sama..hikhikhik). baju kasual dh pulun shopping last week kat kl. This time mmg mama admit, babah choice is better than mine..mungkinkah disebabkan mama pening on that day of shopping, so semangat shopping tu tak meluap-luap then nk pilih baju pun jd lebih kurang ?(alasan again..hihihi). Tapi sesungguhnya kami puas hati..dengan budget yg ada, dpt la one third almari baju dierorg dipenuhkan. Sape tak nak biler offer 40+50% (members only)?. So, amat2 la puas hati.. .For those yg buat kenyataan..sanggup byr rm10 lebih asalkan shopping selesa, rasanya lebih dr RM 10 beza price kami. One more thing, ckp mmg la senang sbb you all tak alami lagi..tak de kids lagi..tak tau mcm mana mahalnya baju kids nowadays...pi raah..buat menyakitkan hati jer ingat remarks tu. Then, utk kuih muih, mmg tak beli satu pun kat opis sbb my dear husband kata dier yg uruskan tahun ni. Risau gak tak bwk pe balik umah mentua. Teringin beli kek, tapi rasanya dh byk sgt order kek (sbb kebetulan sama birthday auni). So, mama hanya prepare kordial..special kordial yg susah dpt tempat lain (eceh.., maklumlah..keje kat pusat teknologi makanan). Cukupla kot utk amik hati seissi keluarga.

Ok, tak tau nk citer apa lagi.. . So, hopefully hari ni berkemampuan utk ke lab..buat apa2 yg patut. Moga umat islam seluruh dunia selamat menjalani ibadah puasa.. .Till then, bye!

Allo..we just come back from sweet n memorable holiday at Kota Kinabalu, Sabah. Dalam kalut-kalut psl H1N1, kami kamikaze redah jugak pergi eventhough berperang sendiri sungguh ke nk proceed jugak holiday ni. One reason why we proceed this holiday is solely because this is holiday with my father n mother-in laws. As a 'menantu pilihan' always, when it comes to my MIL, i banyak say yes eventhough dalam hati nak sebut no.. hihihi... sungguh la tak ikhlas. Tak sanggup nk cancel sbb plan dh lama, plus bukan selalu dpt flight price yg murah mcm ni plus it is almost 90% sponsored by my FIL..so apalagi, peluang bukan selalu.

Anyway, the holiday is superb. Minus the flight experiences. As we expect, akif will 'well behave' in the flight. On the way to KK, he almost success to menyelongkar nyonya sebelah punya handbag. Manage to sleep least than 30 minutes but luckily atuk took him away so we have break without him for about 1 hour. On the journey back from KK, he managed to throw fruits to amoi sebelah and almost grab chocolates from her tray. What make thing worst, there is no atuk and nenek around, we flying back one day early from them. Anyway, because of extremely exhausted he felt asleep and mengamuk tak ingat biler dh nk turun..ayoo... .Such a nightmares.

So, back to the holiday, we stay at 1 Borneo apartment (latest mall in KK),atuk bought 1 unit there save us hotel budget a lot!) and we managed to jln-jalan at Mount Kinabalu National Park. Makin angin kat Kundasang dan timpohon gate (the entrance for climbers). Such a beautiful scenery. Suka yang amat dok sana. Main swimming pool tak ingat kat apartment sbb actually there only 40 residents living there out of beribu-ribu..the apartment is still new..so it is not fully occupied yet. Buat swimming pool tu mcm mak bapak punya..best la sangat. We have dinner at Kg Nelayan Restaurant..ada culture show during dining. Manage to have photoshoot with the dancers and the best part, my hero which is my son, got kisses from every girl dancers..his dad actually jelous but never admit to mama.

After dinner, jalan-jalan (least than a hour) at pasar tamu.. (jalan-jalan with 2 small kids and orang-orang tua..tak syok langsung nk shopping). Since we're living at the shopping mall, mama and da da manage to have midnight show watching G.I Joe..adooi sudah lama tak dating sejak berstatus ibu ni..midnight lagi tu. Since tak de baju tebal my MIL suruh bwk blanket. dengan selambanya bukak blanket dlm wayang sbb plan mmg nk tido..penat woo sehari suntuk jalan-jalan. Tapi sbb citer tu penuh ngan action..tak tidor pun...siap tak leh tido biler sampai rumah. Ok la citer tu..worth for watching at cinema. The next day we only spend at the mall before depart to airport. Husband kesayangan confidence flight kul 5.30, so, kami decide nk bertolak dr umah pukul 2.30. since dah kehilangan tiket..no idea where it was, kami check in just nice.. .The flight is actually 4.15 pm. Jauh tu bezanya. Hancur luluh harapan nk sambung shopping kat airport.. .hihihi.

Anyway everything is ok..we have great time during the holiday.. .We sure to come back to KK as long as atuk tak jual or rent that apartment. Tak puas la pergi sekejap-sekejap. Disebabkan keseronokan bercuti, as expected mama mcm tak de mood kat opis hari ni...huhuhu..excuse again!

okla..better to do something.. .We're looking forward to come back to KK..maybe biler dh kurang sket H1N1 ni.. .till then, tata.

Allo.. .The honeymoon period is finally over.. . Working days without punch card is heaven! . Being far away from office (actually area Kl jer..) attending two totally different courses, hopefully will transform me become more better (can't think other word) worker in term of attitudes and skills (i learn new techniques somehow). Huh, and today, the routine start again..kelam kabut with two little kids and as a result of waking up late, i have red for my punch card. I deserve it! Something bad happen then, my car's windscreen is cracking..i'm not notice it until auni point to me..and it is quite obvious. I feel extremely dissappointed thinking that the ringit that will fly for replacing the windscreen, but what i feel more heartbreaking is when my dear husband said it is ok, even he is not see the windscreen yet! huh..guy is always guy. I Hate it so much!
So, back to work, i'm always thinking to buy the punch card set and put it in my house. The punch card in my office is supposed to be 5 minutes late but somehow they fix it according to normal hours. As a result, lots of people become a victim. It is not bothering me if I really late but its really heartwrenching when we saw 8.01,8.02 , and it never reached beyond 8.05! so, i fully support the previous practise which is the machine should be 5 minutes late from exact hours. It is not really matter when we arrive at office but for me the important part is how many hours we're working. The existance of punch card machine could be one of the factor to contribute heart attack or high blood pressure for workers like us. Driving like crazy just to make sure our punch card is not red , doesn't make any senses for me. But, what shall i say..i'm a little people who is can't asking but just doing (learn it from thumbelina movies..heheheh). As long as i'm working here or even others company which have this machine, i have to follow it..understand!.
Anyway, the past two weeks is so great for me. Meet nice and amazing peoples who is so humble. Learn new things is the things that i like to do. They are the expert in their own field. Most of them had obtain pHD but they never want to be known as Dr. I adore them so much. But the things had happen. The main purpose to attend all sort of courses is to improve you so you can work better. So, now Fadilah, wake up and do your work ! You can't attend courses all the time (Its tiring though) and this is the reality. Anyway, I'm officially declare Julai is month of courses and meeting since my planner for this month has full with all sorts of meeting and courses! hahahah..doesn't sound like a researcher rite?! Pity my lab..the glassware, the standards and my baby..the HPLC..i'm miss them a lot..but what can i do? i will back to lab very soooonnn....hihihiii.
About the two little monsters.. . They are getting better. Akif appetite is back to normal. Syukur. Auni is ok..no fever or flu for the past 4 weeks, so it is really ok for us. Just get mad with the new staff at their day care. 7.45 am but still can't wake up! Who is perform subuh anyway? Pat the negro teacher or aishah, rin and ila the muslim? i'm so confuse.. .If they are sleepy what about the parents? We are sleepy too taking care of our kids in night but we still have to work. And your working hours is 7 am till (depends on the last kids pick up from the daycare) , so i'm consider 7.45 is your working hours. I really have to talk with the big boss. Standing 5 minutes in front of the gate is so annoying for me. This is one of the factor why my punch card is red for the past few days.. . Excuse again.. hihihi. .
Ok, nampak macam balas dendam.. this post has become like semi novel. gtg. Lots of management work have to do today since i have to attend another courses next two days.. . Heaven, no need to punch card anymore..heheheh. well, till then, tata.

Allo...sepatut2nya dah nak tido..tapi lepas mengemas satu umah tadi, tetiba tak mengantuk la pulak. The kids insya Allah dh settle, so this is mama time for blogging. Anyway, one of my close friend dh officially take maternity leave hari ni, so mamaonie akan jadi super pendiam for the next two months kat opis...hehehe..boleh caye ke?. Ermm..she is more like my soul adviser, one of fren tempat maamonie melepas segala masalah..so,lps ni tak tau sape pulak mangsa seterusnya. hahahaha. Anyway, hopefully segalanya dipermudahkan, baby n mummy selamat. Baby jgn banyak hal, auntie2 kat luar ni ramai yg tak sabar nk jumpa. And for me, its time for me to 100% concentrate with work..no more excuse or most important thing godaan merewang,mengumpat, makan2 or what so ever..hihihihi. Hopefully everything will turn fine.. Actually igot another one close fren, tp sbb opisnya jauh la sgt,not so sure segala aktiviti akan diteruskan ke lepas ni. .Maybe lepas ni akan makin rajin ber blogging sebab dh tak de sape nk bercerita..hahahaha.
So, updates about our life, baru balik dr outstation 4 d/3n kat JB. Brief conclusion, we could only stay at hotel for 3 nights since bebudak2 tu dh macam apa dok terperap dlm bilik hotel lama2. Akif, ekzema jadi makin teruk, suspect aircond 24 hrs..kulit kering sgt2. Selsema lagi. Cirit birit lagi.. (this thing serius risau). Auni selsema, tp kelakanya sampai simpang umah nangis..tak mo balik nk tido hotel lagi.Ayoo..mama dada dh mcm boring yg amat, dia nk tido lagi..adoiilaa. So, manage to go to NUS. What a beautiful campus. Bigger n greener that UM, i thought..tak tau org lain pk apa. Tapi yg boringnya, tak de proper arrangement. So end up, naik turun tangga yg memenatkan badan. Hopefully kalau ada lagi,bolehla tengok betul2.
Back about akif, food poisoning dier quite serius. tak mo makan. Cirit birit ntah bapekali hari ni. Risau sgt. Kalau bukan cuti dh tak byk sangat + bape kali dpt direct line missed call dr opis hari ni,mmg esok rasa nk cuti lagi. Ni yg selalu buat rasa guilty. For working moms, saat mcm ni mmg sedih kan. Hopefully esok dier dan seleranya (yg penting) akan bertambah ok. Last talk with auni td pun buat maam diam sekejap. "Mama hari ni byk marah. Kesian kakak n adik". Ya Allah, barulah 3++ yrs old budak ni. Ni la susah biler anak dh start byk ckp.Pulak tu apa yg di cakap betul pulak. Mmg guilty sgt. Bagusnya kalau diberi peluang menjaga anak 24 hrs tanpa sebarang bebanan kewangan. Alangkah bagusnya mcm certain people. But what to do. Always remeber, Allah know best for us. Insya Allah segalanya akan ok di bawah lindunganNya. Aminn...
Okla, gtg. Mcm bunyi Akif bgn lagi. Till then, tata.

Allo..i'll try to steal some precious time for blogging at office. Lots of significance things happen. Life is too short and we could learn a lots along that way. Its definately true. Rasa dh amat penat sgt dgn macam-macam yg terjadi. Perlu membrsihkan diri, jiwa dan raga dalam mencari ketenangan yg hakiki. Eceh..poyo giler ayat. Tapi hakikatnya, itu yg sebenar-benarnya di mahukan. Perlu belajar berfikiran postif sentiasa. Redha dan sabar dengan apa yg terjadi. Slowly, we could feel stronger to face anything. Let the other party do what they want to do. I'm enough with this. I have other important things to focus.
We had a wise discussion last week. Its some kind of pembersihan jiwa for me. I learn lots of things which i almost forgot lately. We had a heart-to-heart talk with my friend who is just come back from Holly Land, Mecca. Its a talk that really open up my mind. Syukur alhamdullillah. So, i have a new mission now, to be a positive ever person who is always remember everything that happen to me and my family is a test from almighty Allah. We have to learn Redha and patience.Insya Allah. i really have to move forward with positive attitudes!
Updates about my two little monsters, their school is moving quite far from currenly location. I feel so stress when know about this until accidentally langgar pagar rumah. (u love to langgar pagar rumah..each rumah u dh langgar pagarnya..ayat sinis my dear hubby..perghhh). Tambah lagi stress. There is no more relaxing time after this. Currently what i'm practise are, bathing, cooking, sometimes laundry before fetching them. Next week i have to do all the things with them. It would be a huge messy situation. Thanks Allah we have just sign up for the weekly cleaning agent and it really helps me a lot. Hopefully things will get better in time. Aminn.. .
So, we're going to have secret celebration this weekend . I'm afraid i could not booking transformer movies this weekend (i can't access to the cinema website from tuesday! arghhh). Hopefully we could enjoy our weekend and the week after this to the fullest!.Till then tata

Allo..at last i got my precious private time to blogging. So, lots of things happen for the past 3 weeks.

Auni ngan gaya transformer. Hihi..This picture was taken when she was admitted at SDMC last few weeks. Demam panas yang disebabkan ear infection. Hopefully jgn la berulang, sbb mama dan dada (mungkin adik akif skali) tak suka berulang ke hospital. Boring yang amat. Kesian anak mama, drip ngan blood test yg mcm2, sampai trauma tgk nurse. Hopefully akak will be stronger dan tak mudah sakit lagi.
















Then, ni gambar latest akif. At last, pak cik mamak (yer ke? ke india?) yg selalau berkhidmat sbg barber akif telah kami pecat! muahahaha. Sekarang ada mamak baru..Dada. Hihihi. Kiterorg decide beli terus mesin tu sbb trim rambut akif sgtla mahal kosnya. RM10 sekali trim, sebulan 2 kali. Tak berbaloi.. .Then pakcik ni langsung tak leh berambut pjg. Nnt keluarla rashes yg tak logik keluar. Anyway, Acu kata gambar ni mcm akif tgh buat haji or umrah.. .Mcm pakai ihram.. .padahal towel good morning mama yg dikorbankan. For the sake of akif, mama rela dalam paksa..hihihi.


















Last but not least, Happy birthday to the man of my life. My other half, my soul, n etc yg mushy-mushy.. hihihi. The person yg plg sabar melayan kerenah mama. The person who always be there whenevere i need. Father of my two adorable kids. Moga Dada panjang umur, murah rezeki, sihat selalu dan sayang kami sampai bila-bila. Moga Dada makin sabar dan maintain melayan kerenah kami esp mama. Moga Dada lebih bermurah hati membeli hadiah-hadiah yg best buat kami. Love you till the maks!
p/s: Sorry tak larat cari gambar dada solo, sbb tetiba csi akif ni bangun pulak! Tak larat gak dedicate entry solo utk dada sbb takut dh tak berkesempatan nk buat...hihhi.


Ok, habis cover semua.. .utk mama, busy like always.. personal or carear. Nk cover citer opis..not so interesting sbb keje menimbun2 mcm biasa.. stress + penat woo.. till then bye!

Alloo..rasa dh nk tergolek2 lps maghrib tadi..amat sgt la letih. Tapi sbb pk esok ada guest, nak tak nak kena gak la usik bakul kain yg melimpah luah tu... .Tambah2, pk esok washing machine tu kena keje dalam 2 round lagi..so nak tak nak, kena la buat.. .Sesungguhnya, amat sangat la faham..perasaan org2 yg liat teramat ngan keje-keje melipat-lipat kain ni. Mahu jugak di implement method kak zura..prepare different bakul utk different org kat umah ni..agak-agak tak sempat lipat amik terus dari bakul..hihihi..

Anyway, the last two u weeks was soo hectic. Baru abis kursus yg amat ..(tak reti nak describe), assignment nya sampai kena stay up 1 o'clock in the morning! kalau setakat keje opis mmg buat tak tahu jer...then busy dgn event besar kat opis lagi. Syukur hanya terlibat dalam part perasmian (walau preparation nya mcm nk mampus!), but at last it done! . Esok pun rasa macam malas nk tunjuk muka. Kalau kena sound masa post-mortem, nak buat mcm mana, keje kiter dah siap.. . Malas nk pk apa org lain pk.. .Tambah lagi bebudak tu dh seminggu demam+batuk+selsema (package lengkap), adoii la..mencabar sungguh rasanya. Tiap-tiap hari rasa tunggang langgang hidup. Nak cuti tak boleh, so tawakal je la letak jugak kat sekolah...sungguhla hati tak tenteram...
Anyway..everything is seem better...dah boleh rileks sket the next following week (cross my finger...dh lewat sgt nk achieve milestone).. .so, hopefully life makin tenang, everything akan jadi ikut plan dan kepala otak tak serabut lagi pk benda-benda yg tak sepatutnya..hopefully.. .
Okla, nk say goodbye..till we meet again..ta ta.

Allo..we're back to our so-called-normal life after we have almost perfect weekend. I hate this situation. This is the same feeling for almost 5 years back. The feeling of emptiness without him around. Each and everytime he said good bye to us-mama, auni and akif, the feeling will merge immediately. I really hate it. . I don't know when we could be a very real family like others. I really don't want to think about it.
Anyway we have a perfect holiday for the labour day. Makan, minum, sembang dan tido. That's all. It just perfect after we have the two toddlers yg tgh lasak yang amat. Habis sudah zaman makan2 angin kat shopping complex or picnic2 kat mana2 taman. Since both kids amat la byk ragam biler kat luar, so we opt to stay at home only. Paling tak pun drive to shah alam, to be with my in laws. Since, i am the 'menantu pilihan' always, so kat umah in laws pun sesuka ati tido dan lepak buat2 tak reti menolong mak mentua kat dapur. Nak buat mcm mana, ada anak kecik(alasan lapuk..hahahah). So, we enjoyed till the maks our precious holiday. And this is why i feel badly sad when he say goodbye.
We're going to meet da da next two weeks, and we're really looking forward for that day. I better go since the two little monsters will wake up from their napping anytime. Till then.. ta ta.

Allo.. .so nervous utk esok. Benci dan menyesal jugak rasanya. Buat apa sanggup nk cover keje org, tapi rasanya bukan salah sape2 sbb the person in charge kata everything dah ready, just cover dia in case ada apa2 yg dierorg nk refer..but..email dari director ptg td lain macam jer bunyinya..dahla personal email..ayo...what have u done???!!!... . Tobat , next time check dulu apa kerjanya, apa yg perlu dibuat baru sanggup cover! ada faham?!
Anyway, lots of things happen today... . Hari ni routine check up kakak. Dhla tak jumpa dr yg sepatutnya, end up dok situ almost 5 hours..ayoo..migrain maa.. . Kononnya nk amik time slip jer then masuk semula opis siapkan apa2 utk esok..tapi mmg malas dan down yg amat sgt..penat pun yer jugak. Her scoliosis become worse. Tadi tak rasa sedih sangat, sekarang bila ingat apa yg doktor tu cakap, baru rasa sedih.. .Perlu ke aku percaya sbb itu bukan the real consultant..i mean dr yg selalu kami refer..tapi mcm the other dr said, he is the second man, plus mmg itu yg akan terjadi..cuma tak percaya ia terjadi cepat sangat. She will undergone the operation next year. Next october, one more x-ray, then what i'm afraid most will happen sooner. Operation utk remove one of the lumbar spine. Right now, baru teringat risiko nya, since it involve spine so risiko utk kena nerves is there- less than 10%, so consequence utk dia lumpuh (the worst case) mmg ada. Ya Allah, mama tak boleh imagine semua tu. I'm feel totally helpless.. .
okla, dh ngantuk ..dan kena get ready utk esok..till then, bye!

Allo..kind of stress lately. Asyik rasa nk mengamuk jer dari celik mata sampai nk tutup mata utk tido. PMS kot? tak pun amatla super duper penat lately. Kat umah terkejar2 uruskan 2 little monsters tu, kat opis byk sgt keje ad-hoc. Adoii..kesudahan rasa mcm zombie jer selalu. Amat sangat penat.
Tak tau nk reduce stress tu mcm mana. So kesudahannya orang2 disayangi menjadi mangsa. Feel bad, tapi masa mengamuk tu dah tak ingat apa!. Banyak pulak citer, bukan dari kalangan org2 biasa sumbernya..top management yang ala2 tak reti buat lawak je.. . tensen la.. stress lagi!The two kids pun dah almost 2 weeks tak baik2 selsema+demam+batuk. Little domok naik rashes tak ingat punya. Kulit dia amat sangat sensitif mengalahkan pompuan sejati, tu la pasal mudah sgt allergy. tu la, kelemahan dok nursery..mudah sangat sakit2.. .peningla mama. Pernah satu malam, dia tak boleh tido sbb gatal, menggaru mcm apa padahal air cond bilik temperature 16.. tensennya mama Allah saja yg tahu. Tak reti nk describe macam mana tepunya perasaan ngan berdenyut2 nya kepala lately sngkara tensen semua benda ni. Sungguh mengharap ada jalan keluar utk kurangkan semua tekanan ini. Mungkin akhir2 ni, 24 jam yg ada dah makin kurang untuk bersamaNya. Solat pun dalam keadaan terkejar2, hati dah lama hilang ketenangan. Mohon dariNya, diberi kesempatan, walau sesibuk mana pun, diberi peluang selepas ni utk berdamping denganNya..amin.. .
Okla..dh tak leh mengarut lama. Tetiba si domok kecik bangun, patutnya pukul 6 pagi, tetiba dh terpacak kat sini pulak (baru 8.20 pm!)..then kakak dari tadi sibuk nk main ABC.. .ok, till then, tata

Allo..feel quite down lately. Don't know why actually. Am I jelouse? am i mad? Confuse. I don't have to feel that bad since it is not what i want. My true passion is purely deal with all those instruments. So, why i still feel like that.... . Hmm...U really have to focus. It is the time for u to concentrate with what u want. It is the chance for you to explore it freely by yourself. Just focus on it! huhh...i really hope i could do that.




Anyway, back to the two little monsters, they have adapt slowly to the new environtment. I hope so.. . We don't have much choice dear. Mama and da da hope both of you will understand sooner.




Ok, nothing much to say.. ta ta.

the two little monsters during kenduri rumah baru uncle odie..

Allo..so, pagi tadi ala2 marathon siapkan semua benda sorg diri. Dah expect things will be like this but never imagine it will turn this way. Bangun mandi kul 5.30 am. Muahaha, sejuk giler.. .Terpaksala utk mandi yg selesa tanpa gangguan 'en .... kecik' tu. Biler bawak dia turun, mulut dia tiba2 menjerit bik!. Hello, bibik umah mana pulak la dipanggilnya. Abis sudah zaman mama bersenang lenang (sungguh ker?). Sekarang, everything kiter kena uruskan sendiri2 bertiga!. Ada paham mr domok?.
Life is not soo bad without maid. After almost a year, mama tak buat apa2 chores, sekarang rasa bersilat jer sepanjang masa kemas umah ngan uruskan 2 little monsters tu. Nak kata ok, tak jugak. Nak kata teruk, rasanya sempat jugak basuh dan lipat baju, basuh pinggan, menyapu dan mop. Tak de pe la yg berlonggok2 atau bertimbun2. Kira settle la tu kan. Domok n kakak pun siap makan, siap mandi, kira ok la kan. Cuma tang mama nk masuk toilet, mandi esp, macam pe jer si domok kecik tu menangis. Baru nk suap nasik, bergayut kat kaki besrungguh2. Adoiilaa. He become so clingy lately. Musykil mama. Nk kata bf, mama sempat bf dia sampai 4 mths jer. Bukan dia nk pe2, cuma kena sentiasa depan mata dia. Jangan hilang sesaat. Dan si princess halus pulak selalu sabotaj mama. Biler mama hilang, dia pun panik sama. Mama kat toilet dia yg ketuk seribu kali. Macam mana domok kecik tak meraung. Kelaka la budak2 ni.
Anyway, kiterog dh officially say goodbye to our present maid. Dah dihantar ke ejen. Walau hilang 1k++ jugak, tapi dari keadaan lagi parah, biarlah dia pulang. tak leh nk citer apa salah dia kat sini. Maklumlah dia manusia biasa jugak (walau hakikiat, tiap2 hari citer kat member2 gagasan kat opis! hihihi..utk mengurangkan tekanan perasaan). Biarlah. So, we all decide nk stop for a while dari ada stranger kat umah. Best jugak. Selamat barang2. Tak yah berperangsangka selalu..awatla itu cepat habis..ini cepat habis.. . Space pun banyak yg kosong..bilik maid dh convert jd bilik mainan. Syok jugak. Yg paling penting, mama tak sakit hati selalu dan marah2 ngan da da. (sorry da da for being punching bag selama ni..hehehe). Hopefully everything will turn fine.
And last week, mama try for being fully housewife (ikut da da meeting kat melaka), alamak susah jugak la. Ada jugakla muncung2 sbb tensen ngan 2 ekor tu. Macam pe jer biler bergabung berdua. Tapi best jugak sebab 24 hrs depan mata, biler2 nk turun swimming pool, biler2 nk shopping, sesuka ati jer mama ngan 2 little monsters buat. Syok2. heheheh.
Okla, nnt sambung merapu lagi. Risau kat domok kat nursery. Hopefully dia tak nangis muntah2 macam selalu. Tolonglah adik, jgn buat teachers lain panik tak tentu arah. Till then, bye!

Allo..this is what i want for sooo long... . After my old blog has to shut down becoz of some personal matters (stalker?! no more privacy??), i always want to start at the new spot somewhere sometimes. Hari ni berjaya jua dilakukan nya..muahahahaha. Anyway, i love to blogging since its some kind of theraupatic sessions. Like today, i am stress to the maks. Actually dh a few months back stress, tapi selalu ignore je. But today, yesterday to be exact, apa yg di geram dan dibebani selama ini berjaya diluahkan jua. Lega? Puas hati? macam tak gak.. . Anyway, i shall write down things yg betul2 buat rasa stress melampau ni. Hopefully dengan share secara virtually di sini, rasa stress tu akan berkurangan...

• Masalah helper yg tak sudah... Am I tooo fussy? I don't think so.. . Tapi 2 helper (going-to-be 3) next weeks, look something wrong somewhere right? . Tensen biler dah bayar ribu riban, kesudahannya datang keje main-main. The previous is sooo good. Keje cekap, anak2 sayang BUT berpacaran ngan bangla. Biler dinasihati, protes kata nk balik.. . Baliklaa, pening kepala weii layan org protes2 ni. The current maid, ala-ala bello, tapi rupa2 nya bijak tak terkata. Anything yg dikunci habis semua pandai di bukaknya. Rumah mengalahkan org tak de helper. Tak sakit hati???. Tak sabar nak say goodbye..(hopefully..).
• Masalah org2 yg tiap2 hari wish tak yah tengok lagi. Tapi nk buat camner, mmg takkan tercapai hasrat tu punya.. . Sesumpah yg tak sudah2 berlakon. Doa banyak2 moga dia betul2 sedar dan berubah sesungguhnya.. (tak minat elobrate banyak..menyakitkan hati!).
• Masalah kijo..apasal ntah satu probs hilang, tambah lagi satu probs. Biler nk acvhieve semua milestone mcm ni. Dah baiki ribu riban, tak selesai2 jugak. Paling stress hari ni, mcm mana run standard tapi banyak pulak pek lain (for those yg paham la..). Takkan tak pure la standard nya. But at the end , peak yg dinanti muncul jugak. Rasa berbungga2 hati. Baru paham biler depa citer mcm mana best nya biler dpt peak yg dikehendaki. Terus kansel nk emergency leave esok..tangguh jumaat la melayan movies (alhamdullillah hidup dilindungiNya..hehehe, padahal tak mo membazir mobile phase..duit rakyat wei! ahakss..)

Anyway, itu antara masalah yg betul2 membebani. Tak de masalah, tak de la life kan. Since rush nk jumpa my prince, princess n my king(hihi)..so, next time la sambung yer. I'm soo relieved to be virtual again. ta ta.